From Robinl@s054.aone.net.au Mon Mar 02 20:40:30 1998
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From: Robin Lawrie <Robinl@s054.aone.net.au>
Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative.erotica.moderated
Subject: NEW:Rampant Love Prongs, VOY,Q,P/K/J/T,NC17,1/1
Date: Tue, 03 Mar 1998 03:40:30 GMT
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   Date:
        Tue, 03 Mar 1998 02:29:47 +1000
    To:
        ascem@earthlink.net
  From:
        Robin Lawrie <Robinl@s054.aone.net.au>
 Subject:
        NEW:Rampant Love Prongs, VOY,Q,P/K/J/T,NC17,1/1


================
Rampant Love Prongs
================
By Robin Lawrie
robinl@s054.aone.net.au
Nov 1997 - Mar 1998
DS9, Q, J/K/P/T, [NC17] for masturbation, nudity, m/m, m/f, 
f/f.

"Sex"? What the hell's "sex"? "Fuck"? That's something you 
yell when you spill coffee in your lap. Hey Chakotay! Grabba 
hold of *this* and pull! It feels great!

After Janeway's knock back, Q chucks a hissy fit and takes it 
out on the crew. Janeway has some explaining to do. 

Thanks to deagol for the idea and Grant for the Holodoc scene. This 
is more about exploiting a great idea rather than a story with a 
plot. It took a while to get around to finishing, cleaning up a 
backlog of old stories. The title comes from a term used in an
assgm story. I near cacked myself when I read it the first time.

Disclaimer:  Star Trek, Star Trek Voyager, and the characters 
in this story are the property of Paramount.
=======================================

'Oh go on Kathy, please?'

'No! And that's final.'

'You're just saying that to tease me. Mmm, I like being 
teased.'

'That's not my intention.'

'So you're not teasing? You do want to fuck me?'

'NO!' Janeway stood naked and angry in the middle of her 
quarters facing a well dressed lanky entity who leered 
constantly and kept up his pleas for sex. She wasn't naked on 
purpose, but every time she grabbed something to wear, Q 
would snap his fingers and send it off into another dimension. 
Or back into the closet; she hadn't checked there yet. Rather 
than continue the game for his amusement, she'd stayed put, 
wrapping herself in her dignity, something Q would find very 
difficult to snap away.

Q pouted. 'I don't like being denied Kathy. I can't understand 
your reluctance. Everyone else on this ship seems to be 
having it off in spades. Why, the maintenance required on the 
turbo lift walls alone is using up most of beta shifts time. Not 
to mention the Jeffries tubes. Do you think B'Elanna 
schedules all those inspections out of some misguided work 
ethic? They all sneak in there and couple like fevered stoats!'

Janeway fumed, but made a mental note to check over the 
maintenance schedules. 'That's none of my business as long 
as the work gets done, and done well.'

'But no nooky for Kathy.'

'Not with you or anyone until we get home.' 

'I see. So the Captain is setting an example for the crew. I 
think I can help you out.' Q raised his hand to snap.

'Q! What are you doing!'

<*snap*>

'There. That'll keep them a bit more focused. It's only fair, 
Kathy. If you're not getting any, if *we're* not getting any, why 
should they?' Q slid off the desk and sidled closer to the 
Captain. He raised a hand that hovered near Janeway's 
breast, but didn't touch. 

Janeway froze, knowing that she had only to lean into the 
touch to free her crew from whatever curse Q had placed on 
them. But no. She'd said no, and she meant it. To concede 
would be to give in to much more than the use of her body for 
an obnoxious alien entity. She had a feeling Q was interested 
in her *because* she wouldn't give in, and like it or not, this 
totally selfish bastard could still be their best chance for 
returning home sooner. The problem was that Q didn't realise 
that he actually *liked* being denied. Janeway knew it. But 
Janeway was human. She slowly shook her head.

Q snorted. 'Ok, be like that. But let me know if you change 
you're mind. I've such a forgiving nature.' Q disappeared.

Janeway relaxed and ran a hand over her hair. Best check the 
closet. Hopefully she still had some clothes left in this 
universe.

***************

'Doctor to Janeway. You'd better come down to sick bay, 
Captain. It looks like we're in the middle of an epidemic.'

Rubbing her face, and feeling around for her robe, Janeway 
snapped awake. 'What epidemic? Report!'

'I think you should see for yourself. No one's died, but the 
symptoms are just awful.'

'On my way.'

So this was Q's revenge. After he'd left last night she'd 
checked with the duty shift, but nothing was amiss. Now after 
an uneasy nights rest it seemed Q's handiwork was revealing 
itself. She dressed quickly, thankful that she still had a 
uniform, and made her way to sick bay.

'Janeway to Chakotay. Meet me in sick bay immediately.'

'Chakotay here. I'm already there. You could say I'm a patient. 
So's Paris, Ensign Kim and nearly all the rest of the male crew 
members.'

'Acknowledged. Janeway out.' What had Q done? It must 
relate to her sexual abstinence, but surely he wouldn't have 
gone as far as castrating all the men? 

Janeway strode into sickbay. Every square inch was full of 
men. With their pants down. With huge erections.

'...!' 

'Captain! Thank god you're here. It started about 6.00hrs this 
morning, but there're reports from all over the ship. I've told 
the others to stay in their cabins until we can work out just 
what to do about it.' The doc hovered anxiously, wringing his 
hands, escorting the Captain to the relative privacy of his 
office. 

Still speechless, Janeway perched on the doc's desk as the 
physician tapped urgently at his console. 'It seems that on 
waking, all these men had a profound swelling of the penis. 
Overnight, something, some virus, I don't know yet, must have 
taken over the ship. I can't find any reference to it in my 
records. I don't know why it would choose an appendage 
whose only function is urination.'

'..what?!' Janeway performed a classic double take. Then it 
sunk in. Q. She had to ask. 'But doctor, what about sex?'

'Sex? What's sex?'

************

'Gentlemen. Can I have your attention please?' Janeway stood 
on a biobed and faced a roomful of concerned, upturned 
faces. 'Your condition is not serious. During the night I had a 
visit from the entity known as Q. After a "conversation" ', 
Janeway didn't want to get into details, ' Q deleted the 
memory of certain "actions" from everyone on board and also 
all references to these actions in the computer. The doctor 
and I are working out a plan to remedy this situation. However, 
your immediate problem can be resolved thus.'  She beckoned 
the doctor to get up next to her on the biobed to address the 
crew. The hologram had reprogrammed himself with a fully 
functional erect penis of astonishing length and breadth "it's a 
visual aid, Captain", and had deleted his trousers. 

'Pay attention, people. I'll only do this once. There's nothing 
wrong with your penis.  You all have what's called colloquially 
a "hard on". According to the Captain', he glanced sceptically 
at Janeway, 'these things happen to men occasionally, and 
quite frequently first thing in the morning. Now, to get the 
swelling down, we need to... what was that expression again 
Captain?'

'Wank.' Janeway cringed. But it was only going to get worse.

'Ahem. Wank. That's the technical term, is it? Good. So 
people, grab your penis with one hand,'

'Which hand?'

'It doesn't matter Mr Paris. Just hold it gently but firmly. Now 
start stroking that hand up and down, and squeezing just a 
little. Use your whole hand, Commander, not just two fingers! 
It's not going to bite you. Very good, that's it, keep it up,' the 
doctor encouraged. Janeway sat down and stared at her 
hands, surrounded by a roomful of men learning how to 
masturbate. Bloody Q.

'Hey! This ain't bad!' Tom Paris cracked a wide grin. 'No, 
Commander, you're still not doing it right. Here, like this.' Tom 
reached over and grabbed Chakotay's dick and started 
stroking it in time with his own. 'See? Doesn't that feel better?'

Janeway closed her eyes and listened to the panting. It was 
going to get very messy, very soon.

'You're all doing very well. Now the next thing's a little hard to 
believe, but the Captain promises that it won't hurt, and that 
it's quite natural. So don't worry. Everyone altogether now, a 
little faster, a little harder, and soon..' the doctor whispered an 
urgent aside to the Captain, 'are you sure?' Janeway nodded 
mutely.

'And soon, ahem, you will feel, and I quote, "a surge of 
pressure build up that will be released in a stream of whitish, 
sticky ejaculate from the end of your penis, accompanied by a 
feeling of intense pleasure",' the doctor curled his lip in 
distaste, and the room chuckled in disbelief. 

The panting, grunting and the meaty slap of a roomful of 
pulled penises continued. 

'Oh..shit. Hey up, something's going on. What the hell? Look 
out!' Tom yelled as cum finally spurted to land stickily all over 
Ensign Kim's bare backside. Like opening the flood gates, all 
the men in the room were coming at once, slipping on spilled 
semen, groaning and cursing their neighbours for staining their 
uniforms in the crowded room. 

Eyes closed, her head in her hands, Janeway sighed. Damn. 
Forgot about the tissues.

*************

The small group hung around in the Captains quarters. 
B'Elanna watched with disinterest as Harry and Tom sat on 
the lounge playing with their pricks, waiting for the Captain to 
arrive. 

'Having fun gentlemen?'

'Crikey B'Elanna, this is really great. I could do this all day. 
And you say you don't have one of these? Bad luck for you.' 
Tom worked his hand faster.

'I can't understand how we ever got anything done before.' 
Harry groaned as he rubbed a thumb over his cock head.

'Or why we have to wear pants. Damn! Here it goes again! 
Quick Harry, you got a tissue?' Tom bucked his hips and held 
the flimsy tissue over his dick as it spurted. The door 
swooshed open as the Captain entered. 

'Hang on, Captain. I'm nearly there,' said Harry. 'Ahhhh!' Harry 
emptied himself into another tissue which he passed on to 
Tom to put in the waste recycler. 'That's better.'

B'Elanna shook her head.  'It's been like this all day, Captain. I 
can't get any work out of the men in Engineering. All they want 
to do is play with themselves. It's not fair.'

'Can't blame us.' chuckled Tom. 'It feels so great.'

'It can get better.' Janeway intoned from the safety of her 
desk. 

'Yeah, right.' drawled Harry. 

'Listen up you three. I'm not happy about the current situation 
but I'll be damned if I ask Q for help. I want you to be the first 
crew members to relearn the ah, *skills* involved in having 
sex.  And it looks like I'll have to be the one to teach you. 
Then you can organise a roster for retraining the whole crew. 
Think of it as on-the-job training. Hopefully we can have this 
episode behind us by the end of the week.' 

Janeway rubbed her fingers along her brow. Damn Q for 
forcing her to break her commitment like this. Now, according 
to him, she would have no excuse for refusing Q sex. Well 
she'd think of something by then. Starfleet captains were 
trained to be sneaky bastards.

'You're making it sound like an overhaul of the warp engine 
and about as much fun.' griped B'Elanna.

'This isn't easy for me B'Elanna. I'm just doing my duty as a 
Starfleet Captain. Just one thing before we proceed. Tom, 
Harry, however nice it feels to you, please don't wank in public 
again. Trust me on this. When we get back to the alpha 
quadrant it will get you into a lot of trouble.'

'Aye Captain.' chorused the boys sadly.

'So what's the first lesson Captain?' B'Elanna urged.

'Ok people. Let's get naked. First lesson is anatomy. Who's 
got what and what parts go where.' Janeway slowly and 
reluctantly slid open the front of her jump-suit and peeled it 
down. By the time she'd skinned her grey skivvy over her 
head, the two men were already naked and playing with their 
dicks again. B'Elanna had folded her uniform in a tidy pile and 
was waiting expectantly. She pointed at Toms lengthening 
member.

'I suppose that's "TAB A". So where's "SLOT B"?'

Janeway placed an arm around B'Elanna's bare shoulder 
feeling the sinewy half Klingon muscles slide and bunch, for 
the first time wondering if this session wouldn't be as bad as 
she thought.

'B'Elanna, you'll be surprised. Pleasantly surprised.'

***************

'I'm *not* putting *that* in *there* !' B'Elanna set her jaw and 
stared stubbornly at the sandy haired pilot.

'C'mon B'Elanna. You'll love it. Really. I mean, look at them 
go.' Tom tried coaxing. Across the room, the Captain and 
Harry were gasping for breath. Janeway was astride the young 
ensign, her hair loose and messed up, her arms behind her 
clutching Harry's legs, her head thrown back showing a long 
line of clear white flesh down her throat, shoulders, breasts 
and firm flat stomach. Her thighs were tensed from the 
workout of pumping up and down on Harry's dick. 

'I mean, the kissing part wasn't so bad. That felt kind of nice.' 
She gave a little smile to Tom. 

'Well do some more of that then. And give this a rub while 
you're at it.' Tom gave a leer and nodded towards his bobbing 
penis. 

' Bloody hell Tom Paris! Hasn't the novelty worn off yet? 
You're obsessing about that piece of flesh.' B'Elanna sat back 
on her heels and poised a finger to flick his rampant love 
prong. (sorry. I just had to put that bit in. R).

'Don't! The Captain said...' he whined.

'The captain said! The captain said!' mimicked B'Elanna. 
'There must be something else we could try. Check the 
manual.'

Tom reached for the PADD with a rough list of "Things To Do 
During Sex" that Janeway had jotted down for them. 'Here we 
go. Number One. Kissing.'

'Done that.'

'Number Two. Breast Fondling.' Tom reached out and tweaked 
Torres' tits. 'Right. Tick that off.'

'Gee thanks.'

'Well it's not my fault your breasts don't work. Look at the 
Captain.' Harry was running his hands up Janeway's stretched 
torso cupping and pulling at her breasts, rolling the nipples 
between his thumb and finger, and getting some great 
thrusting moans in response. 'See?' They watched for a while. 

'Hers *are* a different shape.' nodded B'Elanna after some 
serious consideration.  'Never mind. Next?'

'Number Three is Penetration. But *you* don't wanna do that.'

'Damn right. Paris, you *piss* out of that thing.'

'Ok, Ok. Number Four is Oral Sex.'

'What, talking about it? We're doing that now and it's not 
getting us very far.'

'Wait up, she's done a sketch.' Paris keyed frantically. 
'Oooooh, I see. This could work. If you liked kissing, you're 
gonna love this.'

'Let me see.' B'Elanna wrestled for the PADD but Tom flung it 
away under the lounge. 'Bastard!'

'Relax, Lieutenant. I'm a quick study. Now lie back and let me 
kiss you.' Paris shoved the reluctant Klingon hard back against 
the pillows.

'We've *done* kissing,' she complained.

'I'm not kissing your mouth.'

'What? oh. OH! OOOOOOOOHHH!!! YEEAAAHHHH!!!' 

'Like it?'

'Move, and you're a dead man.'

**************

Janeway hauled herself off the unconscious ensign, and gave 
a reflex swipe at her loosened hair. By crikey that boy had 
hidden talents or else he was a fast learner. She briefly 
considered promoting him, but the log entry would read a little 
strange. She noticed Tom and B'Elanna were nearly finished 
exploring the delights of oral sex. Tom still managed to pull on 
his dick with his face buried deep between B'Elanna's thighs. 
Maybe it was time to wake Harry up for lesson number two. 

'Mr Kim! Report for duty!' Janeway smiled as Harry sat bolt 
upright, a shocked expression on his face as he discovered 
he'd been sleeping on duty.

'Sorry Captain. I must have been very tired. Did I do OK?'

'At ease, ensign. Your performance was adequate.' No need to 
give the boy a big head. 'Now watch and learn. This is 
something you and Tom might like to try. It's a "bloke" thing.  I 
just don't have the equipment to demonstrate properly.'

'OK.' Harry looked uncertain, but an order was an order.

Janeway grabbed some lube and slicked up a finger. Tom was 
leaning over the arm of the lounge, head tucked between the 
engineers thighs as she lay on her back, her legs wrapped 
around Tom's head and shoulders. Janeway approached 
Tom's bare bum, and laid a steadying hand on the smooth 
round globes. Tom grunted, but B'Elanna's hand held his head 
in place. Janeway glanced back at Harry who squirmed a little 
under her stare. 'Watching ensign?'

'Yes ma'am.' Harry wriggled uncomfortably, but for some 
reason, his dick was getting hard again. So he stroked it a bit, 
just like the Captain had showed him. That made him feel 
better.

Janeway ran her finger down Tom's butt crack till it pressed up 
against his arse hole. 'Steady Tom. Now just relax. Take a 
deep breath then let it out slow. Easy, big fella.' As she felt 
Tom relax, Janeway slipped in her finger. Tom's bottom 
tightened reflexively, as Janeway worked her finger in and out, 
seeing her pilot lose concentration on his tongue work, much 
to B'Elanna's frustration. The engineer's growls sounded loud 
above Tom's low moaning. Janeway beckoned Harry over, 
and passed him the lube. He started to lube up a finger, but 
the Captain shook her head. She pointed to his dick.

'But...' Harry was about to argue, but an order was an order. 
The Captain knew best. He got to work, and in short order the 
ensign's dick was shining wetly. Janeway dragged him closer 
to Tom, slipped her finger out, and waved Harry to 'Get on 
with it.'

So he did.

******************

'I *thought* I told you not to move, Paris!' B'Elanna was 
incensed. Paris had ceased his ministrations and was making 
quite a deal of noise. Something must be hurting. Good. 
Serve him right. 'Captain! What's going on?'

'Easy, B'Elanna. Leave them to it.' Janeway helped the slim 
young woman off the lounge, and they watched the two men 
for a while. Harry's eyes were closed and Tom had a firm grip 
on his own penis. As usual. 

'But I thought SLOT B was for ...' B'Elanna started. Janeway 
gave a slow shake of her head. 

'You're an engineer. You know you work with what you're 
given.' The captain slipped an arm around B'Elanna's waist, 
feeling the smooth skin and underlying muscle. She felt 
B'Elanna shift closer, her bare leg pressing against her.

The half Klingon woman rumbled a low growl. 'So what do 
*we* work with, Captain?'

Janeway smiled and ran a finger down B'Elanna's bare chest 
grazing an erect nipple. Despite herself, she was nearly 
feeling kindly towards Q for this opportunity. Again, she 
thanked some nameless deity for the wonderfully talented 
crew she was blessed with.

'B'Elanna? You've got what I've got.'

'So it's the kissing and the oral sex then?' B'Elanna brightened 
instantly.

'Absolutely. Plus I don't think Mr Paris was adequate in his 
coverage of breast fondling and "stroking all the good bits" 
technique.' They glanced back at the two men grunting away, 
having a lovely time. 'Let's adjourn to my bedroom. These two 
have got the hang of it by now.'

'Yes ma'am! Ouch!' B'Elanna squeaked happily as Janeway 
slapped her bare rump on the way past. Oh yes. This was 
turning out to be a good day after all.

***************

Q perched outside the ship, peering in through the window. 
Nobody noticed him; they were all far too busy. Poor Kathy. 
She should have known better than to try and outsmart an 
omnipotent being.  At least she'd be less tense now. He'd go 
on letting her think that she was doing him a favour by 
denying him sex. It made her happy to think that she'd won. Q 
liked to see her happy. What was a few wet moments for a 
corporeal body part compared to the satisfaction of emotional 
control? Making Kathy happy had been the hardest challenge 
so far.  

Q tapped a slim finger against his lips. Now. What was next? 
That's right. He grinned a slow grin. This *would* be fun. In a 
flash of light, Q disappeared thinking about just what it was 
that would make Captain Kathryn Janeway "afraid".

******************
******************

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