From predx@rbaf.demon.co.uk Wed Jan 21 00:10:56 1998 Path: news9.ispnews.com!news8.ispnews.com!news1.ispnews.com!europa.clark.net!199.0.154.56!ais.net!uunet!in1.uu.net!nntp.earthlink.net!alexas From: predx@rbaf.demon.co.uk (Predatrix) Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative.erotica.moderated Subject: Il a chaud au Q (x-over, Blake's 7/TNG, Avon/Q), humour Date: Wed, 21 Jan 1998 00:10:56 -0800 Organization: Better Living Thru TrekSmut Lines: 189 Approved: ascem@earthlink.net Message-ID: NNTP-Posting-Host: 207.217.151.32 Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=ISO-8859-1 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit X-Newsreader: Yet Another NewsWatcher 2.4.0 Xref: news9.ispnews.com alt.startrek.creative.erotica.moderated:3736 Subject: Il a chaud au Q (x-over, Blake's 7/TNG, Avon/Q), humour Date: Tue, 20 Jan 1998 13:03:56 GMT From: predx@rbaf.demon.co.uk (Predatrix) Newsgroups: alt.startrek.creative.erotica.moderated Is torch still on here; if so, this is dedicated to her. Because it's a dialogue. I tend to write b7 slash, not trek, but for Greywolf & Killa & Ruth & all the rest of you whose stories I've enjoyed, I wanted to delurk, & a crossover is an acceptable compromise as I'm a read-only treksmuteer. Thanks for the idea to Hanneke on the Blake's 7 smut list: she did a Chakotay/Avon PWP (plot? what plot?) which made me think "Chak's a pussycat, it would take more than him to bother Avon, it would take a god... Hmmm !" Cheers, Pred'x [snippet] "Who are you, and what do you want?" "A very creditable effort, Avon, but that stony expression is only really effective with a creature that doesn't read thoughts. Oh, excuse me: this uniform is making you unnecessarily paranoid: I really don't intend to imply that I come from one of your primitive quasi-military organisations. There. Isn't that much more comfortable?" "I don't even *have* a black silk dressing-gown. What do you want?" "You do now. And put the gun down, I'm not threatening you." "You were right the first time, Avon; it wouldn't affect me." "Somehow it seems a shame to waste that on my clothes. I expect you have very nice hands." "I wondered what it would take to get through your composure. If I had known nakedness would do it, I would have removed my dressing-gown to start with." "I was not flirting..." "No. *I* was, though. And you *do* have nice hands." "This probably isn't a hallucination: it's too consistent. It could be a very powerful lucid dream, but I don't seem to be able to wake up by intention alone." "You're right. I am not a hallucination. Nor am I a rogue Auron with miniaturised teleport capacity or psychokinesis. Would it help if I *did* let you shoot me dead? Messy, but if it would make you feel more comfortable... No, I insist, it wouldn't discommode me for a minute, it isn't as though these things are a real challenge to put together." "What are you, and what do you want?" "It's very simple. I'm god. And I'm bored." "I am no sort of authority on religion, but in the few banned books I've seen nobody mentioned god with an erection. I was expecting... oh, robes? Angels? Harps? Beard, and a stern-but-fatherly expression?" "Oh, I'm not *that* one: met him occasionally, bit of a bore, really. There are lots of gods. It's a big multiverse. My name's Q, if you would like to use it." "You look as if you need a drink, Avon." "Why are you stroking my hair?" "Oh, you've had a shock, and humans find comfort in tactile stimulation. From my point of view: it's nice hair." "Of course, you wouldn't know, but us humans consider stroking a person's hair a fairly tame form of tactile stimulation..." "Well, that was fairly convincing evidence that either this is a dream or you're a god. We've just kissed each other for ten minutes, and neither of us needed to stop to breathe. Are there any more interesting refinements you can manage?" "Instant bed, instant nakedness, and instant lubricant... All right so far, but why does everyone make these assumptions about which role I'm going to take... thank you, Q." "Do you remember how to do it from on top, Avon?" "Has anyone ever told you you're bitchy, annoying and intolerable, Q..." "About as often as they've told you the same thing." "What's the matter, Avon?" "I was just wondering, casually, whether god has a prostate. I suppose I could find out by doing this, and this..." "Apparently so." "God wants you to fuck him harder." "Is that... an order..." **** "You know, I may not think you humans are very complex beings, but as well as being good in bed..." "...some of you are quite powerful communicators on the emotional level..." "From the fact that you're staring into the middle distance, I assume you're thinking about someone else." "Oh, excuse me, Avon. I didn't mean to offend you." "You didn't. I'm not looking for a serious relationship at the moment, and with a god I'd never be able to *escape.*" "When he's upset, I can hear him from three universes away... bien sur, mon Capitaine: with you in a moment." "Oh, and by the way, I've done you a favour..." *** "Only a dream, thank go..." "What? Oh, Avon, this *is* a surprise. When you said, "never again", I knew I could change your mind eventually, but I didn't expect you'd creep into bed with me in the middle of the night. Not that I'm objecting, mind you!" "Oh fuck." "Well, of course, Avon, if you insist..." 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